Translation of what a woman means by saying the following:

[mehulkamdar]

Translation of what a woman means by saying the following:


1.) FINE: This is the word women use to end an argument when they
are right and you need to shut up.


2.) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an
hour. Five Minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five
more
minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.


3.) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means
something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing
usually end in fine.


4.) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!


5) Loud Sigh: This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal
statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are
an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing
with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)


6.) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a
woman can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard
before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.


7.) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just
say you're welcome.


8.) Whatever: Is a women's way of saying F... YOU!

9.) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement,
meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times,
but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking, "what's
wrong?" For the woman's response refer to # 3.

[stunngun]

The police force/intelligence bureau/etc were out to hire people and see how brave they are and how well they would serve in the face of adversity!

They had 3 people lined up for the post. 2 men and 1 woman. They were given guns and asked to shoot their spouse to prove their valor, failing which they would obviously lose the post!

The first guy was sent to the room with a gun and asked to shoot, after a while he came out sobbing and said he just could not do it, it was not in him to shoot his wife!

The second guy was then sent to prove himself and came out crying bitterly.

Then came the turn of the lady and she was asked to go to the room with her husband there and shoot him!

After a while, there was a huge commotion in the room! The woman finally came out, sweat and all! She was asked what happened and she replied that she had shot the gun and it was empty so she picked up a chair and beat him to death!











Moral:
Women are evil! Dont mess with them!

[penpusher]

Moral of the story: Women should be taught how to handle a firearm properly.

1.Before you decide to shoot somebody,always check if your gun is loaded and not by looking down the muzzle

2.If you are out of ammo.there is no need to pick up a chair,a gun works very well as a club

Another version I have heard involves Santa strangling his wife

[Mack The Knife]

Before you decide to shoot somebody,always check if your gun is loaded and not by looking down the muzzle.

Another version I have heard involves Santa strangling his wife

Santa Singh or Santa Claus?

[Grumpy]

Excellent Mehul. Subtle yet clever - and all the better for being so. Remarkably accurate as well.

[stunngun]

SSS said

*Moral of the story: Women should be taught how to handle a firearm properly.*

Awwww, men aren;t good teachers, eh?

[penpusher]

A teacher can teach something only of the students are willing to learn.I have tried to convince my wife to learn to shoot without any success so far. Stunngun,you have an opportunity to learn to shoot.I suggest you take it up.There are some women who can teach the bulk of men shooters a thing or two.About shooting I mean.Try to join their rank.

SSS

[mehulkamdar]

Grumpy,

I got that in a mail from an old girlfriend who recently shot a lion on a safari where her husband just ragged along. What a dork he must be! I hope to persuade her to psr pics of herself with her trophy over here. Would be nice for the world to see an Indian woman with a lion trophy.

Stunngun,

I agree with my friend penpusher that you should actively try shooting. Those who have tried it always enjoy it. As penpusher rightly points out some of the best shooters in India are women. No reason why you should not be among them.

[eljefe]

Stun gun,
Read about Russian women snipers in WW2-There was a whole corps of them and they made such superlative shots that they ended up becoming the elite in a Male driven society...and I mean 'shots' in terms of 'kills'
There's no doubting the tenacity that a commitetd female of the species brings to her task, human included.I had 2 female trainees whom I sent out on a 'routine' ambulance call-the patient collapsed, these two didnt know how to use an advanced airway technique, so they used what they knew and rolled him into the ER perfectly alive, and enough oxygen to go to the moon.
Get to Siri before Dev goes away to Oz.

Mehul, Some friends you have!
Would be great to see that snap.
Best
Axx

[stunngun]

Sorry for the delayed response! I just ahve a habit of goin into my shell ever-so-often!

hey SSS!
Get your wife to join here, I am sure once she is here, she wont be able to resist wanting to learn to shoot!

I am actually amazed that you guys think that I could be amongst one of the best shooters! If I hold the gun without shivering, that would be an achievement!

I did make an arrangement with a friend to teach me but then after reading posts here abuot ear and eye protection, I thought hard and have decided to wait till I learn from a professional and not someone who will hand me the gun and ask to shoot outa the blue!(***please guys, no lectures on this one!)

Hi Mehul and Eljefe!
I do plan to learn the art! It;s just about getting myself to Siri Fort and have mailed Dev too, a week back or so! He is outa town from today onwards and has told me about someone who teaches the basics! But I dont see myself on the learning spree right away but what I do is, I read the posts here and am acquainting myself with the technical terms! Will take time thou!

[mehulkamdar]

Stunngun,

If you're going to shoot air rifle then you would not need ear protection, just eye protection. What you need are a pair of good industrial safety glasses with plastic (CR 39 or NS 200 polymer lenses) which would be available from any good optician in Delhi. If you wear prescription spectacles then a large pair with CR 39 lenses would be very safe.

Ear protection could be taken care of by using ear plugs or headphone type hearing protectors. There are ear plugs rated upto 30 dB which I'd be happy to send across with Inder when he returns to India in mid January for you and any other member here who wants them. I'd be happy to mail a can of 50 pairs and they are reusable so anyone could use them over and over after washing them in tap water after every use.

A good coach would be a very nice way to begin shooting, no doubt at all. Though, to be honest, most of us learned to shoot by being given a rifle or shotgun and potting away at targets at a distance when we were younger. I did get coached in the ISSF matches when they were called the UIT matches (yes, in the days when Jesus wore shorts and Krishna played the flute ) but over the years have delberately un-learned what I learned back then because that kind of shooting is good only for paper punching at fixed distances.

Take your time and learn to shoot. There are several factors that would be of advantage to you - in shooting the small bores, in general, women have been known to be better shots than men, though, what the reason for this is, I don't know. With heavier recoiling guns, the matter of physique takes over and men are usually better shots though these days there are women who shoot big bore rifles with properly damped stocks very, very well. The 1000 yard world record is currently held by a US woman shooter firing a 5 shot 50 BMG group at that distance for a 4" group. That must have been some shooting!

Get your friend to go with you when the boys here coach you. He would also enjoy this, I can guarantee that to you, and we would have one more convert to our cause. Of course, if you guys make it to Chicago, I would be most happy to introduce you to our little group here and also arrange for coaching by coaches for the US national teams in smallbore rifle, shotgun and, if you dare, in big bore rifle matches as well.

Cheers!

Mehul

[stunngun]

Hi Mehul!

Thanks for the information! I have finally got soem news and there is a shooting club, 5 mins drive from my place! Guess I'm just getting lucky in life!

About heavy guns, I was goin thru another forum as it says that a beginner should start with a 303 rifle since it is heavy and keeps the hand steady!

Will get back once I join the club and make my first shot!

Till then!

[Sujay]

About heavy guns, I was goin thru another forum as it says that a beginner should start with a 303 rifle since it is heavy and keeps the hand steady!

Will get back once I join the club and make my first shot!

Till then!

All the best and once you get back pleae let us know about that forum ( the one which says heavy rifle keeps the hand steady).

[stunngun]

Thanks!

It;s a community on orkut where someone said but believe me , shooting is all about stabilizing hands,nothing more.and that can be achived using heavy guns initially and then going for smaller ones. lighter the gun,more difficult it is to shoot accurately.

[mehulkamdar]

Stunngun,

Just saw you on Orkut and checked through the community that you referred to though I couldn't find the post that advised shooting a 303 first. To be honest, that is very poor advice because there is a risk that any new shooter could develop a flinch if they start off shooting a rifle whose recoil might hurt them.

As an adult I am sure you are strong enough to shoot a 303 but would still suggest starting with something smaller like a 22 lr which ahs no recoil at all and then moving on to a kicker. Were you in the USA, I would suggest a 30-30 or a 35 Remington levergun as a step up and then on to rifles in the 270/303/30-06 class. India, unfortunately, does not offer those luxuries.

Again, speaking about Orkut, there are some well meaning people there but if you want to get some good information about guns and shooting you are sure to find better information on the Pakistani hunting and shooting groups than on the Indian ones. Our neighbours across the border have access to vastly more guns and can shoot them regularly. Before 1984, Indians had the same freedoms.

Anyway, good luck and do let us kow how your shoot went,

Mehul