All in the mind

Post all jokes/ quizzes/ teasers/ 'identify this' type of posts here
Post Reply
Big Daddy
Shooting true
Shooting true
Posts: 536
Joined: Fri Sep 18, 2009 6:54 pm
Location: Hyderabad

All in the mind

Post by Big Daddy » Sat Jul 31, 2010 2:33 pm

:D A first-grade teacher was having trouble with one of her students.

Teacher: What is your problem?

Boy: I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in the third-grade and
I'm smarter than she is. I think I should be in the third-grade too.

The teacher took the boy to the principal's office. While the Boy waited in
the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation
was.

The principal told her that he would give the boy a test and if he failed to
answer any of his questions he was to go back to the first-grade and behave.
She agreed.

The boy was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he
agreed to take the test.

Principal: What is 3 x 3?
Boy: 9

Principal: What is 6 x 6?
Boy: 36

And so it went with every question the principal thought a third-grade
should know. "I think the boy can go to the third-grade", said the
principal.
The teacher said she had some of her own questions to ask. The
principal and the boy agreed.

Teacher: What is it that a cow has four and I have only two?
Boy: (after a moment) Legs.

Teacher: What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?
Boy: Pockets.

Teacher: What starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious
and contains thin whitish liquid?
Boy: Coconut.

Teacher : What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?
The principal's eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the
answer, the boy was already answering.

Boy: Bubblegum

Teacher: What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog
does on three legs?
The principal's eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the
answer...
Boy: Shake hands.

Teacher: Now I will ask some "Who am I" sort of questions, okay?
Boy: Yep.

Teacher: You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I get
wet before you do.
Boy: Tent

Teacher: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The best
man always has me first.
The Principal was looking restless, a bit tense and took one large vodka
peg.....
Boy: Wedding Ring.

Teacher: I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you blow me,
you feel good.
Boy: Nose

Teacher: I am a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver.
Boy: Arrow

Teacher: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in 'K' that means lot of heat
and excitement?
Boy: Fire truck.

Teacher: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in 'K' and if u don’t get it u
have to use your hand?
Boy: Fork.

Teacher : What is it that all men have one. It is longer for some men than
for others. The pope doesn't use his. Normally a man gives it to his wife
after they're married?
Boy: SURNAME.

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and said to the teacher, "Send this Boy to the University”. I got the last ten questions wrong myself!
The early bird gets the worm, but the fact is, if the worm had woken up late, it would still be alive.

For Advertising mail webmaster
vishu20_inin
Learning the ropes
Learning the ropes
Posts: 38
Joined: Fri Sep 11, 2009 11:48 am
Location: New Delhi

Re: All in the mind

Post by vishu20_inin » Sat Jul 31, 2010 3:37 pm

Good One Keep Going
ROTFL
:cheers:

tonysilas
Almost at nirvana
Almost at nirvana
Posts: 140
Joined: Thu Feb 04, 2010 2:34 pm
Location: hyderabad
Contact:

Re: All in the mind

Post by tonysilas » Sat Jul 31, 2010 4:25 pm

:D :D :D good joke...
‘The world is filled with violence. Because criminals carry guns, we decent law-abiding citizens should also have guns. Otherwise they will win and the decent people will lose.’’

hvj1
Eminent IFG'an
Eminent IFG'an
Posts: 1369
Joined: Thu Sep 10, 2009 10:05 am
Location: Satara

Re: All in the mind

Post by hvj1 » Sat Jul 31, 2010 5:50 pm

Incredible stuff :D

dilip
Almost at nirvana
Almost at nirvana
Posts: 103
Joined: Mon May 04, 2009 11:11 pm
Location: Mumbai, India
Contact:

Re: All in the mind

Post by dilip » Sat Jul 31, 2010 6:01 pm

ROTFL :cheers: ROTFL
Powale Arms Repaires and Dealer Mumbai

grewal
One of Us (Nirvana)
One of Us (Nirvana)
Posts: 401
Joined: Sat Jan 05, 2008 6:00 pm
Location: Punjab.

Re: All in the mind

Post by grewal » Sat Jul 31, 2010 6:36 pm

I also got most of my answers wrong. But I will definitely like to meet this teacher . :mrgreen:

User avatar
shooter
Old Timer
Old Timer
Posts: 2002
Joined: Tue May 22, 2007 8:55 pm
Location: London

Re: All in the mind

Post by shooter » Sat Jul 31, 2010 7:17 pm

hey good one but wasnt this too posted a couple of weeks ago.
You want more gun control? Use both hands!

God made man and God made woman, but Samuel Colt made them equal.

One does not hunt in order to kill; on the contrary, one kills in order to have hunted. by Jose Gasset.

m24
Veteran
Veteran
Posts: 1089
Joined: Tue Apr 28, 2009 3:57 pm
Location: New Delhi

Re: All in the mind

Post by m24 » Sat Jul 31, 2010 7:52 pm

shooter wrote:hey good one but wasnt this too posted a couple of weeks ago.
Sorry for being a killjoy, Big Daddy. http://www.indiansforguns.com/viewtopic ... 23&t=10145

Regards
Jeff Cooper advocated four basic rules of gun safety:
1) All guns are always loaded. Even if they are not, treat them as if they are.
2) Never let the muzzle cover anything you are not willing to destroy.
3) Keep your finger off the trigger till your sights are on the target.
4) Identify your target, and what is behind it.

Big Daddy
Shooting true
Shooting true
Posts: 536
Joined: Fri Sep 18, 2009 6:54 pm
Location: Hyderabad

Re: All in the mind

Post by Big Daddy » Sat Jul 31, 2010 10:02 pm

Oops and just a month back... :oops:
The early bird gets the worm, but the fact is, if the worm had woken up late, it would still be alive.

Post Reply