Indians For Guns

Best Dog Story

A guy is driving around the back woods of Montana and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale ' He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard.

The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there.
'You talk?' he asks.
'Yep,' the Lab replies.

After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says 'So, what's your story?'

The Lab looks up and says, 'Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA. In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.'

'I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running. But the jetting around really tired
me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.' 'I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired.'

The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.
'Ten dollars,' the guy says.

'Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?'

'Because he's an unrepentant liar. He never did any of that Stuff.

from where do you get all this awsome stories?

Hi Guys,
> Here's another one about dogs.

A German spinster had a Schnauzer (daschound) for a pet, which she took everywhere she went - it even shared her bed.
> Every morning she would hug & cuddle and call him Mein Lieber Schnauzer and never let him out of sight.
> Eventually the dog got bored and would not listen to her calling.
> Worried she took him to a VET - who after examining him found nothing wrong - but the lady would not take this for an answer.
> So the VET said look lady your Schnauzer has some hair growing around his ears - that's why he is a bit hard of hearing; and prescribed an hair remover.
> The lady went to a pharmacy and bought the hair remover & asked the chemist on how to use it.
> Thinking it was meant for her he said - If it's for your arm pits, apply once and don't bathe for a day.
> No said the lady - where upon he said Ah! if it's for your legs apply twice and don't bathe for 2 days.
> NO NO NO said the lady - It's for my 'Schnauzer' - > The chemist then said - Oh Oh pardon me - "Then apply 3 times and Don't Ride the Bicycle for a Week"
Cheers
Briha