Employee appraisal: comments...

[adkol]

For everyone who has ever had an evaluation, just remember – it could have been worse. These are actual quotes taken from MNC employee performance evaluations.

"Since my last report, this employee has reached rock-bottom and has started to dig."
"I would not allow this employee to breed."
"This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a definite won't be."
"Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap."
"When he opens his mouth, it seems that it is only to change feet."
"This young lady has delusions of adequacy."
"He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them."
"This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot."
"This employee should go far, and the sooner he starts the better."
"A gross ignoramus – 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus."
"He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a carrier."
"I would like to go hunting with him sometime."
"He's been working with glue too much."
"He would argue with a signpost."
"He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room."
"When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell."
"If you see two people talking and one looks bored, he's the other one."
"A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on."
"A prime candidate for natural de-selection."
"Donated his brain to science before he was done using it."
"Gates are down, the lights are flashing but the train isn't coming."
"He's got two brains cells, one is lost and the other is out looking for it."
"If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week."
"If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change."
"If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean."
"It's hard to believe he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm."
"One neuron short of a synapse."
"Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled."
"Takes him 2 hours to watch 60-minutes."

[hvj1]

[brihacharan]

> The only job in the world where you start at the top and work your way to the bottom - Is digging a hole.
> Chinese proverb - He who economises on candles begets twins (Penny wise pound foolish)
> Never think you are all by yourself when standing alone in a field -
* The potatoes have eyes
* The corn has ears
* The wind whispers
Cheers
Brihacharan

[pramodsid]

Oh and that reminds me about the Corporate Tree....which was narrated to me by my friend....

Bosses are Like a Bird who sits on a Tree Top...and Employees were on the branches below.
The bird would shit all day. So for the employees, he gets shit from his boss all day.....
But the employees were not disappointed, When they looked up, all they could see was an *******.